I don't remember which it is, but David Sedaris wrote an essay about having ocd as a child. he talks about having to lick the lightswitch plates and tap himself on the forehead with his shoe.
I think my kitten has ocd. He is constantly licking things. And i am aware cats lick things as part of their nature, but it's things like the wall in the living room, the lining of my jacket and cardboard boxes. And legs. he loves to lick legs.
I also just watched him jump on and off f the back of the chair next to the computer 4 times before he ran away, stopping to lick the side of caitlin's ginormous rubbermaid storage trunk.
the cat's got problems.
25 December 2005
20 December 2005
Right decisions, Valor, Benevolence, Respect, Honesty, Honor, and Loyalty.
Maximillian loves Francine
I was at church with my family on Sunday for the "multi denominational holiday extravaganza." We celebrated and affirmed Christmas, solstice, chanukha, kwanza, and then the amalgamation that is unitarian universalism through the lighting of candles.
During one of the many kids stories being told, most likely during "elijah's gift," I decided I ought to start celebrating Yom kippur, the jewish day of atonement.
The theory had a lot to do with my recent realization that I am kind of a scumbag.
Today, I realized that my scumbagginess is only a response to the unadulterated scumbagginess of others. I'm one of those action/reaction people. I'm also starting to believe I have a cocktail personality.
In that spirit:
top 5 things I wish I could take back doing
5. Making one of my friends drink pee when we were 4 years old.
4. Greg Minor.
3. Anything that may or may not be causing the so-called anxiety.
2. Walking out of any number of people's lives without explanation.
1. The butterfly effect of Ann Marie. Although I have no idea what I could have done differently.
Top 5 thing I wish I had done:
5. Moved in September.
4. Taken my swivel chair from Janine's house when I moved out.
3. Hung out at 6c more. Euphamisiticly.
2. Kept track of Jason Wright.
1. Developed better work habits when it came to school.
and the meat of it...
Top 5 things I would do all over again:
5. leave Salem.
4. watch "naked" movies with Matt Barth
3. letting that kid who I don't like buy me drinks.
2. Tell the H.S. to lose my number
1. B the midge.
someday I'm going to go through the spell check and replace every word with the first thing that comes up.
I was at church with my family on Sunday for the "multi denominational holiday extravaganza." We celebrated and affirmed Christmas, solstice, chanukha, kwanza, and then the amalgamation that is unitarian universalism through the lighting of candles.
During one of the many kids stories being told, most likely during "elijah's gift," I decided I ought to start celebrating Yom kippur, the jewish day of atonement.
The theory had a lot to do with my recent realization that I am kind of a scumbag.
Today, I realized that my scumbagginess is only a response to the unadulterated scumbagginess of others. I'm one of those action/reaction people. I'm also starting to believe I have a cocktail personality.
In that spirit:
top 5 things I wish I could take back doing
5. Making one of my friends drink pee when we were 4 years old.
4. Greg Minor.
3. Anything that may or may not be causing the so-called anxiety.
2. Walking out of any number of people's lives without explanation.
1. The butterfly effect of Ann Marie. Although I have no idea what I could have done differently.
Top 5 thing I wish I had done:
5. Moved in September.
4. Taken my swivel chair from Janine's house when I moved out.
3. Hung out at 6c more. Euphamisiticly.
2. Kept track of Jason Wright.
1. Developed better work habits when it came to school.
and the meat of it...
Top 5 things I would do all over again:
5. leave Salem.
4. watch "naked" movies with Matt Barth
3. letting that kid who I don't like buy me drinks.
2. Tell the H.S. to lose my number
1. B the midge.
someday I'm going to go through the spell check and replace every word with the first thing that comes up.
18 December 2005
Pawel translated the poem.
My imagination is a muffled a-bomb
In a black-and-white movie.
It's a bit quiet at night
Just a few shiny "kurwa"
Like diamonds on a ball of drunken mumbles.
In a black-and-white movie.
It's a bit quiet at night
Just a few shiny "kurwa"
Like diamonds on a ball of drunken mumbles.
13 December 2005
10 December 2005
speaking of stupid
I somehow accidentally turned off my message waiting indicator on my yell phone.
So, on a whim i checked to see if i had any new messages yesterday because a guy at work was like, "We left you a message because geroge wanted a cheeseburger..." And there was a joke about george's drinkning abilities and we moved on. But i was like, well, i haven't gotten any messages in a while, maybe i ought to check them.
I had 13 from since the last time i checked, which in itself isn't bad. there wasn't really anything crucial.
The thing that makes me sad is that all of my saved messages were deleted. My Mike Carnes Radiation Vibe message, Drunk dial from Boucher on her 21st birthday, the Kaiser scissorhands debacle. And my admitted favorite--Mikael the drunk russian obsessed with vulvas--ALL GONE!
I was so sad. And in a very real way.
Now i have nothing but new less enertaining crap to listen to.
So, on a whim i checked to see if i had any new messages yesterday because a guy at work was like, "We left you a message because geroge wanted a cheeseburger..." And there was a joke about george's drinkning abilities and we moved on. But i was like, well, i haven't gotten any messages in a while, maybe i ought to check them.
I had 13 from since the last time i checked, which in itself isn't bad. there wasn't really anything crucial.
The thing that makes me sad is that all of my saved messages were deleted. My Mike Carnes Radiation Vibe message, Drunk dial from Boucher on her 21st birthday, the Kaiser scissorhands debacle. And my admitted favorite--Mikael the drunk russian obsessed with vulvas--ALL GONE!
I was so sad. And in a very real way.
Now i have nothing but new less enertaining crap to listen to.
08 December 2005
There is a fine line between clever and stupid.
I don't believe in passive/aggressive internet tactics.
But, so help me, it's so fucking hard to not.
Distraction
May 2005
Me in the back of the cop car.
Dead Sober.
On a Saturday night.
With Dead Sober Tara (everyone ought to be amazed with that one).
On our way back from Sidelines with Aaron Shute.
We went home and climbed into bed with our respective 12packs and watched Hannibal Lector movies.
My car was retrieved the following Monday.
Song of the moment:
Never There-- Cake
I need your arms around me, I need to feel your touch
I need your understanding, I need your love so much
You tell me that you love me so, you tell me that you care
But when I need you baby, you’re never there
On the phone long, long distance
Always through such strong resistance
First you say you’re too busy
I wonder if you even miss me
Never there
You’re never there
You’re never, ever, ever, ever there
A golden bird that flies away, a candle’s fickle flame
To think I held you yesterday, your love was just a game
A golden bird that flies away, a candle’s fickle flame
To think I held you yesterday, your love was just a game
You tell me that you love me so, you tell me that you care
But when I need you baby
Take the time to get to know me
If you want me why can’t you just show me
We’re always on this roller coaster
If you want me why can’t you get closer?
Never there
You’re never there
You’re never ever ever ever there
But, so help me, it's so fucking hard to not.
Distraction
May 2005
Me in the back of the cop car.
Dead Sober.
On a Saturday night.
With Dead Sober Tara (everyone ought to be amazed with that one).
On our way back from Sidelines with Aaron Shute.
We went home and climbed into bed with our respective 12packs and watched Hannibal Lector movies.
My car was retrieved the following Monday.
Song of the moment:
Never There-- Cake
I need your arms around me, I need to feel your touch
I need your understanding, I need your love so much
You tell me that you love me so, you tell me that you care
But when I need you baby, you’re never there
On the phone long, long distance
Always through such strong resistance
First you say you’re too busy
I wonder if you even miss me
Never there
You’re never there
You’re never, ever, ever, ever there
A golden bird that flies away, a candle’s fickle flame
To think I held you yesterday, your love was just a game
A golden bird that flies away, a candle’s fickle flame
To think I held you yesterday, your love was just a game
You tell me that you love me so, you tell me that you care
But when I need you baby
Take the time to get to know me
If you want me why can’t you just show me
We’re always on this roller coaster
If you want me why can’t you get closer?
Never there
You’re never there
You’re never ever ever ever there
07 December 2005
one
FYI: I am a creep.
And now for something a little different...
Ever picture tells a story, Installment 1.
Background: I was excavating my room after moving back home and came across my old toy chest, which was full of pictures. Pictures I had taken dating back as far as 1996. Anyone who knows me knows I prefer to have a camera as an appendage so I don't have to rely on my lacking and disjunct story telling skills to give a clear and accurate idea of what I found to funny. I have pictures of everything, including, but not limited to, the sunbeam bread truck that almost hit me on the highway, the solidified cheeseburger left in the fake flowers at a McDonald's, the yellow loush that was somehow going uphill...
I have a problem. And I'm breaking myself in easy.
March 2005
The picture has Tara and me in it. We are in line at Space Mountain (my least favorite ride) at the Magic Kingdom. It was the first night of our Disney vacation. But that isn't the important part.
Please notice the man in yellow. He is the reason this picture exists. Well, him and his son who cannot be seen from this angle. I don't know what kind of foreign he was, but in his country, they hadn't heard of personal space. Tara and I spent an hour in line ahead of this man. He walked into us. He accidentally held our hand on the guide rail. We felt the residual mist from his small child's spray fan. It was copable.
The camel that broke our backs occurred only 3 rows back in the queue for the ride. Less than 15 minutes from safety. We had been switching off standing in front of the heinous man. Tara was in the back part of the line. We were kind of joking around when the man in yellow coughed. On Tara's Shoulder. She was rightfully grossed out, which made it my shift and the female companion (pictured) tried to reign in her husband by putting him behind her.
I took the back stance. Thinking I was safe because the man had moved, I relaxed ever so slightly. According to Tara, I stopped midsentence, made a horrified face and she saw it drop. The small child, up until that point the lesser of the evils, had intentionally or not tried to forcibly insert his misting fan into my bum through jeans and a bathing suit, lost his grip on it and the thing fell directly between my legs. It was Tara's shift again.
There were a few little things after that and somewhere around the 2nd line in queue, I figured it out. When we moved forward, instead of just facing forward, I turned and directly faced the man in yellow. He stopped about 5 inches from my face and I said, "HI." He backed up and his female companion started giggling. He stayed back for the remaining 5 minutes.
ATTN: If you are that man, Back the fuck up!
And now for something a little different...
Ever picture tells a story, Installment 1.
Background: I was excavating my room after moving back home and came across my old toy chest, which was full of pictures. Pictures I had taken dating back as far as 1996. Anyone who knows me knows I prefer to have a camera as an appendage so I don't have to rely on my lacking and disjunct story telling skills to give a clear and accurate idea of what I found to funny. I have pictures of everything, including, but not limited to, the sunbeam bread truck that almost hit me on the highway, the solidified cheeseburger left in the fake flowers at a McDonald's, the yellow loush that was somehow going uphill...
I have a problem. And I'm breaking myself in easy.
March 2005
The picture has Tara and me in it. We are in line at Space Mountain (my least favorite ride) at the Magic Kingdom. It was the first night of our Disney vacation. But that isn't the important part.
Please notice the man in yellow. He is the reason this picture exists. Well, him and his son who cannot be seen from this angle. I don't know what kind of foreign he was, but in his country, they hadn't heard of personal space. Tara and I spent an hour in line ahead of this man. He walked into us. He accidentally held our hand on the guide rail. We felt the residual mist from his small child's spray fan. It was copable.
The camel that broke our backs occurred only 3 rows back in the queue for the ride. Less than 15 minutes from safety. We had been switching off standing in front of the heinous man. Tara was in the back part of the line. We were kind of joking around when the man in yellow coughed. On Tara's Shoulder. She was rightfully grossed out, which made it my shift and the female companion (pictured) tried to reign in her husband by putting him behind her.
I took the back stance. Thinking I was safe because the man had moved, I relaxed ever so slightly. According to Tara, I stopped midsentence, made a horrified face and she saw it drop. The small child, up until that point the lesser of the evils, had intentionally or not tried to forcibly insert his misting fan into my bum through jeans and a bathing suit, lost his grip on it and the thing fell directly between my legs. It was Tara's shift again.
There were a few little things after that and somewhere around the 2nd line in queue, I figured it out. When we moved forward, instead of just facing forward, I turned and directly faced the man in yellow. He stopped about 5 inches from my face and I said, "HI." He backed up and his female companion started giggling. He stayed back for the remaining 5 minutes.
ATTN: If you are that man, Back the fuck up!
06 December 2005
song of the moment
Romeo and juliet-- Dire Straits
a lovestruck romeo sings the streets a serenade
laying everybody low with a lovesong that he made
finds a streetlight steps out of the shade
says something like you and me babe how about it?
juliet says hey it's romeo you nearly gave me a heart attack
he's underneath the window she's singing hey la my boyfriend's back
you shoudn't come around here singing up at people like that
anyway what you gonna do about it?
juliet the dice were loaded from the start
and I bet and you exploded in my heart
and I forget I forget the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong juliet?
come up on different streets they both were streets of shame
both dirty both mean yes and the dream was just the same
and I dream your dream for you and now your dream is real
how can you look at me as I was just another one of your deals?
well you can fall for chains of silver you can fall for chains of gold
you can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold
you promised me everything you promised me thick and thin
now you just say oh romeo yeah you know I used to have a scene with him
juliet when we made love you used to cry
you said I love you like the stars above I'll love you till I die
there's a place for us you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?
I can't do the talk like the talk on the tv
and I can't do a love song like the way its meant to be
I can't do everything but I'd do anything for you
can't do anything except be in love with you
and all I do is miss you and the way we used to be
all I do is keep the beat the bad company
all I do is kiss you through the bars of Orion
julie I'd do the stars with you any time
juliet when we made love you used to cry
you said I love you like the stars above Ill love you till I die
there's a place for us you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?
a lovestruck romeo sings the streets a serenade
laying everybody low with a lovesong that he made
finds a convenient streetlight steps out of the shade
says something like you and me babe how about it?
I used to do a scene with him.
a lovestruck romeo sings the streets a serenade
laying everybody low with a lovesong that he made
finds a streetlight steps out of the shade
says something like you and me babe how about it?
juliet says hey it's romeo you nearly gave me a heart attack
he's underneath the window she's singing hey la my boyfriend's back
you shoudn't come around here singing up at people like that
anyway what you gonna do about it?
juliet the dice were loaded from the start
and I bet and you exploded in my heart
and I forget I forget the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong juliet?
come up on different streets they both were streets of shame
both dirty both mean yes and the dream was just the same
and I dream your dream for you and now your dream is real
how can you look at me as I was just another one of your deals?
well you can fall for chains of silver you can fall for chains of gold
you can fall for pretty strangers and the promises they hold
you promised me everything you promised me thick and thin
now you just say oh romeo yeah you know I used to have a scene with him
juliet when we made love you used to cry
you said I love you like the stars above I'll love you till I die
there's a place for us you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?
I can't do the talk like the talk on the tv
and I can't do a love song like the way its meant to be
I can't do everything but I'd do anything for you
can't do anything except be in love with you
and all I do is miss you and the way we used to be
all I do is keep the beat the bad company
all I do is kiss you through the bars of Orion
julie I'd do the stars with you any time
juliet when we made love you used to cry
you said I love you like the stars above Ill love you till I die
there's a place for us you know the movie song
when you gonna realize it was just that the time was wrong?
a lovestruck romeo sings the streets a serenade
laying everybody low with a lovesong that he made
finds a convenient streetlight steps out of the shade
says something like you and me babe how about it?
I used to do a scene with him.
top 5 reasons a happy Erin is a good Erin:
I'm funnier when I'm in a good mood.
if i saw one of those in the wild I'd step on it
I do cute little dances
I will do just about anything asked of me.
I have the ability to alter everyone's mood around me.
Because angry erin does things like kick, scream, bite and call you up to tell you your worthless.
I have a phone call to make.
I'm funnier when I'm in a good mood.
if i saw one of those in the wild I'd step on it
I do cute little dances
I will do just about anything asked of me.
I have the ability to alter everyone's mood around me.
Because angry erin does things like kick, scream, bite and call you up to tell you your worthless.
I have a phone call to make.
04 December 2005
You never know til you reach the top if it was worth the uphill climb.
I got my pictures back from the party, some are of note. There were also group shots from Halloween on the camera. cait and I are crazy.
I went out last night with Walsh. The first stop was George and Cari's house. Muenier was there. It was very fun, but I had made a commitment to meet The newest Scott for Kareoke. Ashley Tresoline was there. It was nice to see her. All in all it was fun.
We were supposed to go back to the house and didn't.
Danny called finally, and I didn't hear my phone.
A puke dragon invaded my house today.
I somehow spent $40 at Bjs even though the only thin I got was my pictures.
I'm exhausted in so many ways.
so, look at the cutest out of family kid ever.
I went out last night with Walsh. The first stop was George and Cari's house. Muenier was there. It was very fun, but I had made a commitment to meet The newest Scott for Kareoke. Ashley Tresoline was there. It was nice to see her. All in all it was fun.
We were supposed to go back to the house and didn't.
Danny called finally, and I didn't hear my phone.
A puke dragon invaded my house today.
I somehow spent $40 at Bjs even though the only thin I got was my pictures.
I'm exhausted in so many ways.
so, look at the cutest out of family kid ever.
01 December 2005
I found the perfect picture to start the every picture tells a story saga, but I had to get cat litter.
Max is sick. We don't know what is wrong with him, but he won't eat and can't boot. So we took him to the vet. We think he ate something, which would not be out of character for max. He eats everything, especially things he ought not. We've had a lot of face to face conversations about it. He still eats undigestables.
Anyways, I had to get him Cat litter so he can be quarantined and observed. On my way back from the 24 hour stop and shop, I pulled up to a set of lights. The car next to me was stopped about 3 car lengths from the stop line. I looked into the car and the driver was slumped sideways and backwards in the seat with the top of his head against the window. He didn't move the whole light.
I pulled into the parkinglot next to the lights and walked to the passenger side of his car. He still hadn't moved, so I knocked. He sat upright, looked at me and sped off.
Honestly, how is this my life?
Max is sick. We don't know what is wrong with him, but he won't eat and can't boot. So we took him to the vet. We think he ate something, which would not be out of character for max. He eats everything, especially things he ought not. We've had a lot of face to face conversations about it. He still eats undigestables.
Anyways, I had to get him Cat litter so he can be quarantined and observed. On my way back from the 24 hour stop and shop, I pulled up to a set of lights. The car next to me was stopped about 3 car lengths from the stop line. I looked into the car and the driver was slumped sideways and backwards in the seat with the top of his head against the window. He didn't move the whole light.
I pulled into the parkinglot next to the lights and walked to the passenger side of his car. He still hadn't moved, so I knocked. He sat upright, looked at me and sped off.
Honestly, how is this my life?
27 November 2005
trailerhitch.
The party was fun. There will be pictures. I'm not sure exactly what of, but my camera is full.
I learned an important lesson about mixing rec meds and alcohol, the lesson being a 12 hour will not be through the system enough in 4 hours. So, I'm a little retarded.
Today there was whist and Gloria's. The only better combination imaginable would have been herb's and whist like the olden days, but there was no such luck.
I subjected my poor tattered mind to all three gangi boys for lunch. Aaron hadn't changed from last night yet, but the other two were in good shape. Dave Sims came to play with us. I fed him soup and we took what would have been two series if we were counting it that way. I had a sweet low non no good hand that we almost pulled a whist with. If Dave had had the 3 of spades, it would have been the 14 points, but alas, Matthew knows me to well and we only took 10.
If you understood that, we should play cards sometime.
Summary: I finally understand Dave Attel's Comedy and there nothing that can't be cured by a steak tip sub.
I learned an important lesson about mixing rec meds and alcohol, the lesson being a 12 hour will not be through the system enough in 4 hours. So, I'm a little retarded.
Today there was whist and Gloria's. The only better combination imaginable would have been herb's and whist like the olden days, but there was no such luck.
I subjected my poor tattered mind to all three gangi boys for lunch. Aaron hadn't changed from last night yet, but the other two were in good shape. Dave Sims came to play with us. I fed him soup and we took what would have been two series if we were counting it that way. I had a sweet low non no good hand that we almost pulled a whist with. If Dave had had the 3 of spades, it would have been the 14 points, but alas, Matthew knows me to well and we only took 10.
If you understood that, we should play cards sometime.
Summary: I finally understand Dave Attel's Comedy and there nothing that can't be cured by a steak tip sub.
23 November 2005
The swarm
I am constantly having moments where I find out a trivial piece of information about someone and just sit there going, "what was I thinking?" or "How did that kid ever end up in my life?" Honestly, I don't know how I know some of the people I know and how it is that I came to know them. And I guess by how in that sentence, I mean why.
Why do I know these people?
Coincidence.
On what I swear is a completely different topic, My life has become inundated with Scotts as of this week. My favorite, by far, is the tapdancing, swashbuckling Scott.
Tomorrow is my favorite holiday. If I make it through without hurling, I will be proud. You ought to be as well. I have two meals in under 3 hours that I have to be at. I need to honor my blood.
Party is on Saturday. Shute will not be there. I had a crazy moment when he told me. I'll probably go visit him in a couple of weeks. We'll get hammered and I can be his resident smart friend.
Sunday there will be whist, or so help me, blood will be shed. I miss honing my skills in the art of reading signals and faces as well as having chapstick ducttaped under a table next to the extra set of cards. The nostalgia of it, however, does not take me like some people I know and I would not go back forever, but settle to have a regular game set up.
Use broad and slam pig more.
Why do I know these people?
Coincidence.
On what I swear is a completely different topic, My life has become inundated with Scotts as of this week. My favorite, by far, is the tapdancing, swashbuckling Scott.
Tomorrow is my favorite holiday. If I make it through without hurling, I will be proud. You ought to be as well. I have two meals in under 3 hours that I have to be at. I need to honor my blood.
Party is on Saturday. Shute will not be there. I had a crazy moment when he told me. I'll probably go visit him in a couple of weeks. We'll get hammered and I can be his resident smart friend.
Sunday there will be whist, or so help me, blood will be shed. I miss honing my skills in the art of reading signals and faces as well as having chapstick ducttaped under a table next to the extra set of cards. The nostalgia of it, however, does not take me like some people I know and I would not go back forever, but settle to have a regular game set up.
Use broad and slam pig more.
21 November 2005
Late night TV and movie previews.
This weekend I saw Walk the Line and Harry Potter, both of which were phenomenal movies up until the last scene. I didn't feel like my time was wasted (I didn't pay for either, but they hit the almost 3 hour mark, so time is a factor).
Most importantly, there is a movie coming out about penguins that tapdance to hip hop.
ANYONE who knows the history knows how excited (and slightly pathetic because of the levels of excitement) that makes me.
Secondly, Blind Date. Personally, I like Elimidate better, but I completely forgot about the hall of same that Blind Date offers. So, at 4 this morning, there I was laughing out loud alone in my room at Roger Dodge and the therapist.
Heretofore in my family, the term "play date" has been changed to "Scheduled socialization time" because 11 year olds do not go on play dates and they definitely do not like referring to their food as tiny animal... She's almost at the age.
Most importantly, there is a movie coming out about penguins that tapdance to hip hop.
ANYONE who knows the history knows how excited (and slightly pathetic because of the levels of excitement) that makes me.
Secondly, Blind Date. Personally, I like Elimidate better, but I completely forgot about the hall of same that Blind Date offers. So, at 4 this morning, there I was laughing out loud alone in my room at Roger Dodge and the therapist.
Heretofore in my family, the term "play date" has been changed to "Scheduled socialization time" because 11 year olds do not go on play dates and they definitely do not like referring to their food as tiny animal... She's almost at the age.
18 November 2005
I try desperately not to be a music snob. I know a lot, I like a lot, and I can find a positive for just about every song.
I do, however, have two major pet peeves when it comes to music snobbery:
1. People who say, "No one listens to the same music I do." If no one else listened to it, they wouldn't be making it. And unless you're creating your own Yoko-style howlings/found object instrumentals and recording them, someone else is making it.
2. People who harass me about what I'm listening to or am in love with at the moment and then pop up with it in their myspace profile eons later. Well, that isn't specific to myspace profile music, but they try to introduce me to my favorite song from 3 months ago. Now I know how my dad felt when I got into Aerosmith like 8 years ago.
By the by, if you have never listened to the Talking Heads, "Road to Nowhere," you ought to. And if you've loved it forever, I'm not trying to tell you I discovered it.
I do, however, have two major pet peeves when it comes to music snobbery:
1. People who say, "No one listens to the same music I do." If no one else listened to it, they wouldn't be making it. And unless you're creating your own Yoko-style howlings/found object instrumentals and recording them, someone else is making it.
2. People who harass me about what I'm listening to or am in love with at the moment and then pop up with it in their myspace profile eons later. Well, that isn't specific to myspace profile music, but they try to introduce me to my favorite song from 3 months ago. Now I know how my dad felt when I got into Aerosmith like 8 years ago.
By the by, if you have never listened to the Talking Heads, "Road to Nowhere," you ought to. And if you've loved it forever, I'm not trying to tell you I discovered it.
16 November 2005
14 November 2005
Your girlfriend could have been an burn victim, an amputee, or a dead body...
Slowly but surely, I am unearthing my bedroom. If I have one major fault in the housekeeping department, it's that I'm a packrat. A horrible, horrible packrat. Today I started on what was, in theory, going to be a reading corner. It has my older-than-god comfy chair, two book shelves, and a mountain of shit that hasn't seen daylight since 1999 (when my bed was in that corner of the room). Cleaning that part of the room is a messy task, physically, emotionally and psychologically.
Long story short and illustrated, I found a ton of amnesia lane things... which will be catalogued, duplicated in file firm, and promptly thrown out. Well, most of them will be promptly thrown out. I mean, who can resist?
I don't remember why, but the I hate Matt Gangi Club had about 43 members. We probably could have applied for funding. By the by, Matthew is one of my best friends. And I don't think anyone hates him. Well, at least no one has ever expressed their hatred of him in front of me, which is smart on their parts, because I'd kick their ass.
Best Amnesia lane quote, I do believe coming form Dan Clinton: "We used to hide under our desks from these people and now they're being taken hostage by chickens..." In reference to either the Russians or Germans.
Long story short and illustrated, I found a ton of amnesia lane things... which will be catalogued, duplicated in file firm, and promptly thrown out. Well, most of them will be promptly thrown out. I mean, who can resist?
I don't remember why, but the I hate Matt Gangi Club had about 43 members. We probably could have applied for funding. By the by, Matthew is one of my best friends. And I don't think anyone hates him. Well, at least no one has ever expressed their hatred of him in front of me, which is smart on their parts, because I'd kick their ass.
Best Amnesia lane quote, I do believe coming form Dan Clinton: "We used to hide under our desks from these people and now they're being taken hostage by chickens..." In reference to either the Russians or Germans.
After some research, the answer to eh posed question is because my mother is using the damned toothbrush. I told her it is unsanitary and gross. Bacteria, bristle decay, so on.
All I learned from this ordeal is that I know a lot of things about seemingly useless topics. i.e. the lifespan of a toothbrush or boycut jeans.
tomorrow is sharona part 2.2.
And, on that note, did anyone else see the end of last nights Simpsons. I hope you thought of me.
Fun things. My mother had surgery on Friday. I figured she has surgery before the weekend, takes some time to heal, goes back to work. On Thursday night, I found out this wasn't the case. Hence, my mother and I are home ALL WEEK together. There is nothing longer and more irritating than a week with my mom and me. We don't talk, we have inquisitions.
I don't like being asked prying questions. I'd rather go about my own business and not have to explain it.
Would a woodchuck actually sound like Dave Coulier?
All I learned from this ordeal is that I know a lot of things about seemingly useless topics. i.e. the lifespan of a toothbrush or boycut jeans.
tomorrow is sharona part 2.2.
And, on that note, did anyone else see the end of last nights Simpsons. I hope you thought of me.
Fun things. My mother had surgery on Friday. I figured she has surgery before the weekend, takes some time to heal, goes back to work. On Thursday night, I found out this wasn't the case. Hence, my mother and I are home ALL WEEK together. There is nothing longer and more irritating than a week with my mom and me. We don't talk, we have inquisitions.
I don't like being asked prying questions. I'd rather go about my own business and not have to explain it.
Would a woodchuck actually sound like Dave Coulier?
09 November 2005
07 November 2005
baby's breath and rubber gloves
Somehow, even though we looked incredible, I managed not to get a picture of Cait, Mere and I at Cait's party. Hence, we have a fairly accurate artist's rendition (meaning I drew it in about 3 minutestime and transposed our heads on the picture).
The party was interesting. A couple of Cait's friends were rubbing me the heinously wrong way, but that's why they're her friends and not mine.
My dreams have gotten stranger and more frequent. Last night I fell asleep watching the simpsons and woke up dripping sweat an hour later after "Abduction Dream 3". Friday night I had a dream about barhopping, 2 Ian Fulletons and slitting the throat of a bad transvestite with a paring knife (in all fairness, s/he was trying to beat me about the face with a hammer).
Prior to that we had former male friend theater, featuring Roger, Scott, Gordon, Ken, My boyfriend from right before college and Dany Wolfe. This is a weeks worth of dreams. I wouldn't have ever gone back to sleep if they were all in one. I think that is my equivalent of the naked test taking dream. They were really mundane dreams about crazy things, but not the norm considering who they are. I mean, Scott was trying to convince a carload of people that he had traded his audi in for the beater Volvo (which he had stolen out of a parking lot at the mall) because it got better gas mileage. It ended up being a hobo's car. It was a very Scott argument, tone and languagewise, there were even accurate hand movements.
If I didn't like sleep so much, I wouldn't do it anymore.
On a lighter note, I had a Sharona encounter. I feel so dirty.
The party was interesting. A couple of Cait's friends were rubbing me the heinously wrong way, but that's why they're her friends and not mine.
My dreams have gotten stranger and more frequent. Last night I fell asleep watching the simpsons and woke up dripping sweat an hour later after "Abduction Dream 3". Friday night I had a dream about barhopping, 2 Ian Fulletons and slitting the throat of a bad transvestite with a paring knife (in all fairness, s/he was trying to beat me about the face with a hammer).
Prior to that we had former male friend theater, featuring Roger, Scott, Gordon, Ken, My boyfriend from right before college and Dany Wolfe. This is a weeks worth of dreams. I wouldn't have ever gone back to sleep if they were all in one. I think that is my equivalent of the naked test taking dream. They were really mundane dreams about crazy things, but not the norm considering who they are. I mean, Scott was trying to convince a carload of people that he had traded his audi in for the beater Volvo (which he had stolen out of a parking lot at the mall) because it got better gas mileage. It ended up being a hobo's car. It was a very Scott argument, tone and languagewise, there were even accurate hand movements.
If I didn't like sleep so much, I wouldn't do it anymore.
On a lighter note, I had a Sharona encounter. I feel so dirty.
29 October 2005
Maximillian and thoughts on drinking.
Firstly, I decided last week that I was boycotting the traditional Erin Halloween this year. The last 8 were kind of harsh and I'm looking forward to taking Marissa trick-or-treating.
Second, I'm losing the lip ring and most likely my nose piercing as well. Probably for good. My allergies are nuts and I hate getting nose bleeds. My teeth and Jaw are suffering. And, honestly, what's the point.
Also, I can barely open my mouth because I have been clenching/grinding my teeth at night. It feels as appetizing as it sounds. My jaw makes a grinding sound.
Cait, my dad and I went to see saw2 on Friday. Decent flick. Minimal scary pig face. The junkie is back in it. It features Donny Wahlberg, and, as if that weren't a good enough reason to shell out an exorbitant amount for 93 minutes of your life, in the first scene a man is given the option to slice his eye open or have his face slammed in something that Cait made a "man in the iron mask" joke about.
I have spent the better part of the week giving my kitten stern scoldings. Topics range from why we don't drink out of the toilet to scratching the furniture means you're getting your talons cut to personal hygiene and why not to sit in the litter box to, finally, why you should not stick your ass in another cat's face and expect a rim job. He is the grossest cat ever. And I LOVE him.
So, thoughts on drinking: a series of top 5s.
Favorite people to get wasted with:
5. Topher--All nonsense aside, who else will tolerate a drinking game made up to Center Stage
4. Mike Carnes--a) can dance, b) sings ridiculous 80s music c) "I don't even know where my mouth is, why are you asking me about quarters?"
3. Matthew--He's the only one to appear on all three lists. It's like drinking with my brother... if I had a brother to compare him to.
2. Jason--Who else could convince me it is perfectly normal and fine to walk trough sand and pine needles and gravel GUSHING blood from my foot carrying boxes of Cheese cracker, granola bars and fruit at 230 am
1. Tied between Tara and Aaron Shute-- And in all honesty, when it was happening, it was kind of a package deal. let's discuss. Sean Young. Pigtails. Finish the basement booze night (aka, try to get tara into bed night). And all of us has slept with vega in a semistupor on more than one occasion.
Favorite Drunk people:
5. Kerri Locke--I like her normally, But she is even nicer, funnier, and sweeter after a few drinks.
4. Cindy Gill--"Erin, I can't do my belt."
3. Matthew.
2. Nicole/Kristin--I even like their drunk dialing.
1. Matt Cocoran--Some of the reasons, done perfectly by Roger.
Least Least Favorite Drunk People ever:
5. Danny--but only because he is always drunk faster than me.
4. Janine--Stupid things get done EVERY time and I spent the better part of several morning afters convincing her that she did not become a joke and that who ever either wouldn't remember whichever minor infraction or didn't care. "If I were going to kill you and leave the body, I would have parked closer to the dumpster."
3. Matthew--his decibels increase according to his alcohol intake. DIzio, Loompis, We Lose, Bullshit... The list goes on. Also, he is less likely to refer to me as Donkey when he's sober because he knows how much I hate it.
2. Stephanie--in her defense she's young. But, jesus, I hope she grows into or out of it.
1. The criers--I'm thinking of one in particular, but it's an entire race of girls who drink, hurl, drunk dial, and ball their eyes out. I hate seeing people cry and I like it even less when I have to listen and pretend to be interested and care about whichever life crisis we're working on.
and, so I'm not off the hook,
My top 5 stupidest drunk moments:
5. Kissing the midget.
4. New Years 05, which had potential to be disastrous with Gordon and ended up being tumultuous with Scott instead. Hindsight says, "5 hours and 20 beers does not make you a good judge of character." Won't lie, had a lot of fun.
3. Almost breaking my toe on a rocking chair, bleeding profusely and shortly thereafter passing out on the stairs while waiting for the bathroom to be unoccupied so I could continue puking.
2. BLACK LIKE THE DEVIL!
1. Memorial Day at Marshbag's--Don't remember the particulars, but I picked a fight and got banished to the basement. Dude, I'm the fucking machine. Was still drunk when I got home two hours later, after eating, drinking water and passing out in the car.
Contemplate this:
Second, I'm losing the lip ring and most likely my nose piercing as well. Probably for good. My allergies are nuts and I hate getting nose bleeds. My teeth and Jaw are suffering. And, honestly, what's the point.
Also, I can barely open my mouth because I have been clenching/grinding my teeth at night. It feels as appetizing as it sounds. My jaw makes a grinding sound.
Cait, my dad and I went to see saw2 on Friday. Decent flick. Minimal scary pig face. The junkie is back in it. It features Donny Wahlberg, and, as if that weren't a good enough reason to shell out an exorbitant amount for 93 minutes of your life, in the first scene a man is given the option to slice his eye open or have his face slammed in something that Cait made a "man in the iron mask" joke about.
I have spent the better part of the week giving my kitten stern scoldings. Topics range from why we don't drink out of the toilet to scratching the furniture means you're getting your talons cut to personal hygiene and why not to sit in the litter box to, finally, why you should not stick your ass in another cat's face and expect a rim job. He is the grossest cat ever. And I LOVE him.
So, thoughts on drinking: a series of top 5s.
Favorite people to get wasted with:
5. Topher--All nonsense aside, who else will tolerate a drinking game made up to Center Stage
4. Mike Carnes--a) can dance, b) sings ridiculous 80s music c) "I don't even know where my mouth is, why are you asking me about quarters?"
3. Matthew--He's the only one to appear on all three lists. It's like drinking with my brother... if I had a brother to compare him to.
2. Jason--Who else could convince me it is perfectly normal and fine to walk trough sand and pine needles and gravel GUSHING blood from my foot carrying boxes of Cheese cracker, granola bars and fruit at 230 am
1. Tied between Tara and Aaron Shute-- And in all honesty, when it was happening, it was kind of a package deal. let's discuss. Sean Young. Pigtails. Finish the basement booze night (aka, try to get tara into bed night). And all of us has slept with vega in a semistupor on more than one occasion.
Favorite Drunk people:
5. Kerri Locke--I like her normally, But she is even nicer, funnier, and sweeter after a few drinks.
4. Cindy Gill--"Erin, I can't do my belt."
3. Matthew.
2. Nicole/Kristin--I even like their drunk dialing.
1. Matt Cocoran--Some of the reasons, done perfectly by Roger.
Least Least Favorite Drunk People ever:
5. Danny--but only because he is always drunk faster than me.
4. Janine--Stupid things get done EVERY time and I spent the better part of several morning afters convincing her that she did not become a joke and that who ever either wouldn't remember whichever minor infraction or didn't care. "If I were going to kill you and leave the body, I would have parked closer to the dumpster."
3. Matthew--his decibels increase according to his alcohol intake. DIzio, Loompis, We Lose, Bullshit... The list goes on. Also, he is less likely to refer to me as Donkey when he's sober because he knows how much I hate it.
2. Stephanie--in her defense she's young. But, jesus, I hope she grows into or out of it.
1. The criers--I'm thinking of one in particular, but it's an entire race of girls who drink, hurl, drunk dial, and ball their eyes out. I hate seeing people cry and I like it even less when I have to listen and pretend to be interested and care about whichever life crisis we're working on.
and, so I'm not off the hook,
My top 5 stupidest drunk moments:
5. Kissing the midget.
4. New Years 05, which had potential to be disastrous with Gordon and ended up being tumultuous with Scott instead. Hindsight says, "5 hours and 20 beers does not make you a good judge of character." Won't lie, had a lot of fun.
3. Almost breaking my toe on a rocking chair, bleeding profusely and shortly thereafter passing out on the stairs while waiting for the bathroom to be unoccupied so I could continue puking.
2. BLACK LIKE THE DEVIL!
1. Memorial Day at Marshbag's--Don't remember the particulars, but I picked a fight and got banished to the basement. Dude, I'm the fucking machine. Was still drunk when I got home two hours later, after eating, drinking water and passing out in the car.
Contemplate this:
02 October 2005
I can't see a thing through my eyes that sting...
Yesterday was Octoberfest...
It was kind of a rip of, but very fun. I went with Aaron Shute, Jen Pugliese, Jay and Jay's friend Ian, not Ian Fullerton, though, which made me sad.
I was wasted by 4:30p. I didn't go to bed until 4:30a.
There were some amazing cameos... By Strout and NICKY THE COUCH!!!
And of course, there are pictures.
Things there aren't pictures of:
The man with toilet paper stuck to his foot for eternity who then somehow passes the paper to his female companion, where it stayed for another 5 minutes.
Getting knocked down in the hallway of jay's apartment by Ian and screaming about it at the top of my lungs. I don't remember how I got down there or why, but I have a ginormous bruise.
Me breaking all of my nails, save one, at different points in the evening.
At some juncture, Jay called Scott and left an amazing message.
The Tow truck guys who thought I should go get Aaron Shute's car, even though I could barely stand up.
Me falling asleep sitting up at the kitchen table watching Matt and Gorassi play rummy.
Fashion Faux Pas
me and couchy
"Hey, I know you... wait, I know you!"
awkward.....
Jen, starting (or finishing) off the night
That Kid, meaning Ian
I don't remember this.
this either
All in all, it was a really fun night and I needed it.
It was kind of a rip of, but very fun. I went with Aaron Shute, Jen Pugliese, Jay and Jay's friend Ian, not Ian Fullerton, though, which made me sad.
I was wasted by 4:30p. I didn't go to bed until 4:30a.
There were some amazing cameos... By Strout and NICKY THE COUCH!!!
And of course, there are pictures.
Things there aren't pictures of:
The man with toilet paper stuck to his foot for eternity who then somehow passes the paper to his female companion, where it stayed for another 5 minutes.
Getting knocked down in the hallway of jay's apartment by Ian and screaming about it at the top of my lungs. I don't remember how I got down there or why, but I have a ginormous bruise.
Me breaking all of my nails, save one, at different points in the evening.
At some juncture, Jay called Scott and left an amazing message.
The Tow truck guys who thought I should go get Aaron Shute's car, even though I could barely stand up.
Me falling asleep sitting up at the kitchen table watching Matt and Gorassi play rummy.
Fashion Faux Pas
me and couchy
"Hey, I know you... wait, I know you!"
awkward.....
Jen, starting (or finishing) off the night
That Kid, meaning Ian
I don't remember this.
this either
All in all, it was a really fun night and I needed it.
29 September 2005
revelation.
ATTN: Everyone
By the time you are within spiting distance of you're 30th birthday, you should not be using your higschool as anysort of handle for anything. Seehere.
Opening 2 beers at the same time and switch hitting off of them does not make you an alcoholic, it makes you lazy and smart. The temperature will rise equally in each bottle, so you don't have to drink one entire warm beer and you don't have to get up as often.
On a similar note, "Octoberfest" is this weekend, and I am going with Shute, Jay and whoever want to join us, hopefully, Jen and Ian and possibly sheena. And Matt, if he calls me back.
I do not feel bad for taking 3 of these signs from Hanafords within a months time. Now they remind us of hygene while at the computer.
Cait was stoned out of her face today. She's totally over medicated.
By the time you are within spiting distance of you're 30th birthday, you should not be using your higschool as anysort of handle for anything. Seehere.
Opening 2 beers at the same time and switch hitting off of them does not make you an alcoholic, it makes you lazy and smart. The temperature will rise equally in each bottle, so you don't have to drink one entire warm beer and you don't have to get up as often.
On a similar note, "Octoberfest" is this weekend, and I am going with Shute, Jay and whoever want to join us, hopefully, Jen and Ian and possibly sheena. And Matt, if he calls me back.
I do not feel bad for taking 3 of these signs from Hanafords within a months time. Now they remind us of hygene while at the computer.
Cait was stoned out of her face today. She's totally over medicated.
25 September 2005
The other day i was reminded of a great show that ought to have new episodes. 
Best humor EVER.
Also, tonights family guy was the best of the new episodes, having referenced such greats as Dazed and Confused, 9 to 5 and the Muppet Show. My sister and I were on and of the phone every 3 minutes. Which I guess is kind of sad, considerring we live in the same house and if we communicated for real could probably watch the same shows on one tv.
The best moment of the show was Chris's rendition of "Wake me up before you go go" by Wham.
I started making meredith's halloween costume today. She's being Christine from Phantom of the opera. Her primary Gal Pal is being the phantom.I'l probably take lots of pictures when it's done.
I'm going crazy in this house.
Best humor EVER.
Also, tonights family guy was the best of the new episodes, having referenced such greats as Dazed and Confused, 9 to 5 and the Muppet Show. My sister and I were on and of the phone every 3 minutes. Which I guess is kind of sad, considerring we live in the same house and if we communicated for real could probably watch the same shows on one tv.
The best moment of the show was Chris's rendition of "Wake me up before you go go" by Wham.
I started making meredith's halloween costume today. She's being Christine from Phantom of the opera. Her primary Gal Pal is being the phantom.I'l probably take lots of pictures when it's done.
I'm going crazy in this house.
16 September 2005
Month in review.
It's been a long time. A really long time. But I had better things to do.
So, the day after my last post I got two phone calls from my sister. The first said that our grandmother was sick again and I should come home that weekend. The second (less than 20 minutes later) was the come home right now, she's dying call.
My grandmother died Friday, August 19th.
Later in the day, I was driving back to Maine because my mother and I would have killed eachother if I were there all weekend. As I was stopping to put gas in my car at the Maine Turnpike rest stop, Aaron Shute called me and asked if I was going to the party. I said what party and it got ugly from there. There was yelling witht he windows open and people staring. And it was a lucky thing that I had offered my car to someone for the evening already because I would have done something stupid and mean, Which I don't do. (I do stupid, and I do mean, but I a void both at the same time.)
The funeral services we Monday and Tuesday. Both my Grandma and I wore harlot red. Danny came with me. I didn't cry until, at the actual service, I looked at Meredith who had tears streaming down her face. Cait and I lost it at the same time.
To bury her, we stood on my grandfather's grave.
After, work was work. I had a couple minor altercations with a higher up. I tried not to be twitchy.
Danny came to stay with me at the end of the summer for a few days before we left on the journey.
Went as far as Wisconsin, flew back, cried minimally where people could see.
Jason just called me and that was exciting. He's doing well. He reenlisted and is heading over seas. I'm really lad he called.
OK. KAREOKE...
birthday Debauchery
Other Summer Stuff
My creep of a boyfriend...taking yet another unflattering picture of me.
The banathalon cheerleaders
My Winning Banathalon Team
So, the day after my last post I got two phone calls from my sister. The first said that our grandmother was sick again and I should come home that weekend. The second (less than 20 minutes later) was the come home right now, she's dying call.
My grandmother died Friday, August 19th.
Later in the day, I was driving back to Maine because my mother and I would have killed eachother if I were there all weekend. As I was stopping to put gas in my car at the Maine Turnpike rest stop, Aaron Shute called me and asked if I was going to the party. I said what party and it got ugly from there. There was yelling witht he windows open and people staring. And it was a lucky thing that I had offered my car to someone for the evening already because I would have done something stupid and mean, Which I don't do. (I do stupid, and I do mean, but I a void both at the same time.)
The funeral services we Monday and Tuesday. Both my Grandma and I wore harlot red. Danny came with me. I didn't cry until, at the actual service, I looked at Meredith who had tears streaming down her face. Cait and I lost it at the same time.
To bury her, we stood on my grandfather's grave.
After, work was work. I had a couple minor altercations with a higher up. I tried not to be twitchy.
Danny came to stay with me at the end of the summer for a few days before we left on the journey.
Went as far as Wisconsin, flew back, cried minimally where people could see.
Jason just called me and that was exciting. He's doing well. He reenlisted and is heading over seas. I'm really lad he called.
OK. KAREOKE...
birthday Debauchery
Other Summer Stuff
My creep of a boyfriend...taking yet another unflattering picture of me.
The banathalon cheerleaders
My Winning Banathalon Team
18 August 2005
14 August 2005
Double Standard
Every year, I conduct a social experiment mid August.
Most of you failed.
I tripped up the stairs ifronton of this sign...
Me and Danny
The crew who rolled on my birthday. We went to Margaritas for margaritas. The cute host took the picture, once he figured out how to work the camera. We all looked damn good.
(Top: Matt Barth, Jason, Nathaniel, Danny. Bottom: Andy, Stephanie, Tina, Sarah, Maggie, Nasta Latta, Em, Me, Chrissy)
Jason and Danny
me and Em at the end of the night.
Andy (Sheena's Doppleganger)
Maggie
The only drink I bought myself that night.
Me and Adam, pre outing
MaIgie, Sarah and I.
I love destroying wall flair.
Matthew Ian Barth and I. He busted out his suit for my birthday celebration. He was great.
Bonus:
80s Pizza Night.
Coming Soon
The Big Birthday Celebration. (Subtitled--Erin makes stupid faces at the camera while everyone else gets wasted.)
Also, Jason got fired yesterday. I was a little upset. That's a lie. A lot upset. The reason he was given was that he left work early to go help Danny and Andy move taIles. And moments after i got back from saying good-bye, I watched one of his co-workers leave the dining room in an attention getting ploy and lay down people lobby as several poeple scrambled to get her a fan and water and an ice pack et al. In all reality, the only things wrong with her was that she drank herself retarded the night before and that she's a ginormous drama queen.
I wanted to kick her teeth in.
Most of you failed.
I tripped up the stairs ifronton of this sign...
Me and Danny
The crew who rolled on my birthday. We went to Margaritas for margaritas. The cute host took the picture, once he figured out how to work the camera. We all looked damn good.
(Top: Matt Barth, Jason, Nathaniel, Danny. Bottom: Andy, Stephanie, Tina, Sarah, Maggie, Nasta Latta, Em, Me, Chrissy)
Jason and Danny
me and Em at the end of the night.
Andy (Sheena's Doppleganger)
Maggie
The only drink I bought myself that night.
Me and Adam, pre outing
MaIgie, Sarah and I.
I love destroying wall flair.
Matthew Ian Barth and I. He busted out his suit for my birthday celebration. He was great.
Bonus:
80s Pizza Night.
Coming Soon
The Big Birthday Celebration. (Subtitled--Erin makes stupid faces at the camera while everyone else gets wasted.)
Also, Jason got fired yesterday. I was a little upset. That's a lie. A lot upset. The reason he was given was that he left work early to go help Danny and Andy move taIles. And moments after i got back from saying good-bye, I watched one of his co-workers leave the dining room in an attention getting ploy and lay down people lobby as several poeple scrambled to get her a fan and water and an ice pack et al. In all reality, the only things wrong with her was that she drank herself retarded the night before and that she's a ginormous drama queen.
I wanted to kick her teeth in.
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