30 December 2006
my life as a movie
Opening credits: Everclear-So Much for the Afterglow
Waking up: Bright Eyes-Sunrise, Sunset
Average day: Stevie Wonder-Living for the City
First date: Cure-Just like heaven
Falling in love: Lou Reed-Perfect day
Love scene: 0seven-Do you Believe
NC-17 scene: Hawkley Worksman-Striptease
Fight scene: Dialated People-This Way
Breaking up: Sixth Year Senior-Remember Sleep
Getting back together: Dire Straits-Romeo and Juliet
Life's okay: Fiona Apple-Extraordinary Machine
Mental breakdown: Lou Reed-Bottoming out
Driving: Queen-Don't stop me now
Deep thought: Talking Heads-Once in a lifetime
Partying: BranVan 3000- Loaded
Happy dance: The Cars-My Best Friend's Girl
Regretting: Arcade Fire-Crown of Love
Death scene: Van Morrison-Into the Mystic
Closing credits: Junior M.A.F.I.A.-Playa's Anthem
To Merrimac for New Year's Tomorrow. How time Flies By.
02 December 2006
A series of unpopular opinions.
2. Anime is not interesting. Even worse are American anime style shows.
3. Grunge rock/ whine metal suck. Nickleback and company should die.
4. One should not become emotionally, romantically, spatially and/or above all FINANCIALLY involved with a person who has a habit of tossing people off the second a better, more convenient offer comes along.
5. WTF is a Research Animal Housing Upkeep Specialist. Is that a janitor and cage cleaner? What kind of self important bullshit is that. Plain english is the way to go.
6. The codone drugs are beastly and I have the dry cracked skin on my nose to prove it. I hate and love them all at the same time.
30 November 2006
The cup tastes as sweet as the punch.
I had surgery again on Monday. It was wonderful. I regained full consciousness before they pumped me full of pain meds, and having refused the OC before surgery because I didn't want my nose to be itchy, all the connecty monitor shit that I was still attached gave me a minor anxiety attack--During which I ripped of my oxygen mask, pulse monitor and blood pressure cuff. I was pulling on the IV cord when the nurse came in. I don't like having shit over my face.
Stewart stayed home with me Tuesday, but that gave me most of yesterday and today to sit and mull and be completely unproductive and occasionally artsy.
On the artsy side, I started a new set of stencils for xmas gifts.
On the mulling side, I began to resent not being able to just talk to a series of people who I (still) worry about, even though it's fruitless and just going to drive me nuts. It's a short list of very important people. And most of them are untalkable for stupid reasons, or at least stupid reasons by way of blood.
But moving on... Living in sin is great. I like being with Stewart and living with him is nothing short of easy and comfortable and enjoyable. I haven't had to sleep on the couch yet, although I have threatened to send him after a couple Chinese food nights. My favorite thing about Stewart is that I never have to worry about him. Open and honest is the way to go. I do worry about the other broads... But I can always just punch them.
My highschool reunion was last Saturday. I saw a few people I cared too and a few I was indifferent about. There were a couple really awkward moments involving hugs with people who may as well be complete strangers, but Walsh showed and there was an open bar.
A note on the concept of open bar: NOT a good idea at places where awkward is the anticipated social climate. I drank too much, didn't hit me until about 15 minutes after lying down and then hurling commenced. Like a volcano of ramen and Banana pine needles. And I hurled on the sheets, and Stewart changed them. My mom said it must be love, because she just left my dad on the lawn when he was that bad. Stewart said he was too late, because I was already upstairs and it was a cold night.
And something I need to say out loud and out of context: how can someone disrespect themself enough be with something like that?
amen. good night.
02 November 2006
Just say no to the rage.
We went to see saw III last night. It was good. There were some parts that made me squirm. It definitely left some questions unanswered and a big gaping hole for another movie (Why can't people do trilogies), but all in all it was decent. I like going to the movies with my dad, we have a good time.
My surgery has been scheduled. That, I'm sure will be fun.
I went to Haven on Tuesday with Stewart, Sarah and pojo. I dressed up as a cliche fantasy with the prepschool twist of getting wasted, double fisted style, and smoking like a chimney. I was ready to fight (above link and his hosebeast, because I have respect issues... and jealousy issues... and as pojo put it, just issues). On the ride there was one of those "don't worry about me, I can handle my own" discussions. Stewart said it wasn't me he was worried about. Which stings a little because I don't understand how he can still care about the welfare of such wretched people at all. He must have made his piece. So, I guess I'll have to make mine. Which is much easier to do when you don't have to see someone everyday. Or at least know that they have a key and a penchant of rifling through people's things.
Alas, I did not have to fight, although there was a suspicious Storm Trooper. I ran into three welcome-ish faces from the past and I wish I had had more time to catch up with people. The first was Nicole Underwood. The was wearing a burka and her boyfriend was dressed up like a terrorist. She said she was well. Megan Walker Grabbed me while I was looking for Stewart after using the ladies. She is also doing well, and I told her to continue doing well until next time. When people started to filter out, We ran into Jen Galvin, who I was actually hoping would have made an appearance. I have to send her an email so we can see eachother some time when they aren't booting us out at the end of the night. She said she wants a St. John's reunion at the school. I think it would be interesting to say the least. Even though I'm kept pretty up to date on all of the people I wanted to see.
Summation, The cat just bit my sweatshirt. I'm going to see if Jen wants to grab lunch next week. Maybe when I'm older like my dad, I'll find that zen place he goes when he's pissed off.
17 October 2006
Paging Dr. Dubois
Last week we moved into a larger room, like 20 something square feet larger. And you would be amazed how much difference a functional closet makes in one's attitude towards a living space. We're pretty well settled. My rcord player is hooked up and I just finished listening to my canadian acquisition series (i.e. Luda's money maker and Rod Stewart.
Right now, Stewart is upstairs. He's most likely being yelled by his little older brother for having coffee with his girl friend today. They were talking about what a fuck up he's being lately and how everyone is sick of it and strategies for resolution. I would keep Amanda. The whole thing is ridiculous to me. I just don;t understand how someone gets to 24 trying to argue that candy is a viable way to spend food money.
Caitlin was in the hospital sunday night. She had an absess on her tonsil blocking the back of her throat. My mother had to restrain her when they put the needle in her mouth on account of her poor gag reflex. She went to claw at the doctors who had already jammed a inch draining implement down her throat. The point being that you don't want something that pointy and sharp just dancing around such a delicate area.
The new tumor is 2.2 x 2.3. Not big enough to name. But we find out the course of action on thursday. Until then, Actually until my physical in november, I'm not taking any medication except my allergy stuff as needed.
The end.
30 September 2006
Revelation
I really hope no one is like that with my blog. You'd be coverred in cobwebs.
In reverse Chronological order:
I found out today that a few months ago, right after Lou moved out, there was a rumor circulating that he and his home boys (His similarly fluffy best friend, who from what i know is very nice and the roided out strip club bouncer) were going to come over to "beat us up."
1. Am I 12 again? The last time I seriously threatened to kick the shit out of someone was middle school. Maybe. And to honestly think that those three guys would beat up a house full of people baffles me. It blows my damn mind.
2. The question of which US they were going to beat up. Stewart and NIck for getting therir stuff out of his room in a "reprehensible" manner. Me and Amanda for being there (He also had possesions of mine...) Dee and Steve for not really giving a fuck that he was upset about it. All of us for being grossly negligent of his feelings?
3. How crazy am I that my first response was, "I'd be on the porch with a bat like, 'come on, fuckers.'"
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Canada:
Stewart and I went to Montreal for our 6 month anniversary. We walked an obscene amount. And this is not the Erin obscene standard of further tahn line of vision... LIke 15 miles in 2.5 days. We met two very awesome people (Micheal, our host at the b&b and teh owner of a boutique in teh gay quarter). We ate at La Popessa and got chicken poutine from St. HUbert's. I spend a lot of money on vinyl and we did not go into one Contact Dancing bar or sex shop... Not that I didn't try.
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I'm aking purses for the craft fair teh weekend of the 14th and if you want one, come buy one. Or let me know and i'll put one aside for you to buy. They are mostly cigar boxes and tote bags. and so far, they are amazing.
Pojo is moving in this week and it is most likely that i will be living here full time after Stewart's brother moves out.
It will be such a nice place to live.
17 September 2006
Final Countdown
Went out last night with Nate. We went to Sophia's and were there early enough that it wasn't retardedly crowded. Cece and Zuch met us there and Stewart came after work. There were, however, elderly regulars who convinced the owner to turn the jukebox up all the way (like had to resort to texting conversation loud) and played My Way, Suspicious Minds and New York, New York. These are all song I like and listen to with some regularity and a little bit of nostalgia, but for fuck's sake, no one, not even me, likes Elvis so loud it hurts your ears. It was an ok time.
I had a dream last night that Stewart left me in Canada for his former hosebeast. And I shoved her into a pit of mud and we were at movie theaters and this kid I worked with for about 3 weeks was there. Weird. But I'm driving to Canada, so I doubt this will happen. And I think I would do more than shove just her into a pit of mud.
I'm exhausted and have to work until midnight. I also need to get cracking on these fancy cigar boxes I'm making. Damn craft fair.
13 September 2006
Shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you'll be among the stars
Schoolyard Bully You are 42% Rational, 100% Extroverted, 71% Brutal, and 42% Arrogant. |
You are the Schoolyard Bully! You focus more on feelings than rationality, and thus tend to be driven by your emotions rather than by a steering wheel, because human beings don't have those. You are probably easy to anger or annoy, for instance. You are also an extrovert who wouldn't mind having a lot of attention, although you may not always get it. Another character trait you possess is your brutality, manifested by the fact that you tend to be aggressive and do not care about the well-being of others. In school, you may have been the kid who stuffed the short kid into lockers, or who distributed swirlies to anyone who scored higher than a B on the science quiz. I wouldn't be surprised if you think the word "faggot" is the greatest insult known to man. Also, you exhibit signs of humility, leading one to conclude that you are actually insecure, because very few people are truly humble AND brutal. Thus, like any schoolyard bully, you seek constant attention for yourself and have no issues with administering beatings because you are quite emotional and easy to upset. Not only that, but your insecurity may be a prime motivation for your brutality. As psychologists have noted, most schoolyard bullies only pick on others because they have a negative self-image. This could possibly be true of you. Either that or you are just really hungry and need lunch money. In short, your personality defects are your brutality, extroversion, irrationality, and your possible insecurity. Go pick on someone your own size! But not me. I'm a midget, I swear.
1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational. 2. You are more EXTROVERTED than introverted. 3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle. 4. You are more HUMBLE than arrogant. Compatibility:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble. The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble. The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble. The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble. The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble. The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble. The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant. The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble. The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant. The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble. The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
|
| Link: The Personality Defect Test written by saint_gasoline on OkCupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test |
I thought that was funny. Because it is fairly accurate.
I ate half of the scrawniest rotisserie chicken I've ever seen in my life earlier today. It also occurred to me that there is a fair chance that no one I know now understands the chicken significance.
Suffice it to say it was a rough day once I got out of work. I got lost in Granby on my way to meet stewart for his lunch break. Once I got oriented, I was stuck behind a smattering of retarded drivers.
The highlights of said drivers:
Pick up truck man--Backed out of his driveway less than 100ft in front of me on a road with a 45 mph speed limit. Of course I was going faster than that and had to SLAM on my already faulty breaks and hope for the best. Then he went very slow. For the next mile. And sat at the stop sign through three opportunities to get onto the road.
Then I got into the BJs parking area and some aging democrat put on their blinker and slowed down to go into the dodge parking lot. And didn't. Then they coasted to the end on the road and stopped (there is no stop sign.) and turned. And stopped for a significant amount of time at the next stop sign. There is a fair chance I made an excited utterance, but I don't think it would have been loud enough for purple stationwagon to hear. When we finally turned up the main drag so I could meet Stewart at Starbucks, he stopped blocking my passage into the starbucks parking lot (and the driveway of the bank--holding up 2 other cars) looked at me in his rearview mirror, threw up his hands and tried to stare me down. I just said, "What the fuck are you doing." and cut dangerously close to his car to get by. I never lost eye contact and he moved. I really just wanted to Have a Fried Green Tomatoes moment and repeatedly ram into the car. But I am not older, and I probably do not have more insurance.
I parked to some disgusted stares of kids who should have the right to dress themselves revoked and was reminded that even in Chicopee, assholes and yuppies gravitate to Starbucks. But Stewart was in there, and Ryan was working, so I got a hot chocolate and a marshmallow rice square. Had a couple bites and Stewart needed to leave. We had a snippy moment and he yelled at me. I said don't yell at me and we left. I apologized for being a beast and he apologized for raising his voice.
I inadvertently solicited drugs from Nate. I need to get to a dr soon.
Work is still good, even though I'm sleep deprived from swing shift on Sunday. It seems cruel to flip flop someone between first (be here at 730a)and second(stay here til 1130p)when they have a 45 minute commute. I almost passed out on the couch monday morning.
And in the most exciting news category, Stewart and I go to Montreal a week from today. I am excited. I'm sort of searching for a tour guide for while we're up there. We'll see how it goes. But nonetheless, I'm really excited to get out of here.
29 August 2006
The muppets sang a song about this.
Segue, I reserved Stewart and my hotel room for next month. It's cute and in a B&B (his idea). There's a huge tub in the bathroom. It's within walking distance of St. Catherine's and La Popessa. I'm slightly leery of the destination, being that we both have some history in the city. We'll suck it up.
In a fit of nostalgia, and by nostalgia I mean looking on myspace, I decided I miss my old friends. And I don't mean people with whom I used to be friends and am not any longer, but the people with whom I lost touch through the move and custody disputes and sundry other reasons. This list essentially boils down to the funegrams and Boucher and the younger Venzia clan. And a couple other people.
17 August 2006
Oh, to be lost forever.
Important notes.
Stewart and I went to Lee for a few days and stayed in a condo with a large tub and no internet. We saw the Girls Gone Wild bus in a parking lot of a motel right off the turnpike exit. It was hilarious. There were a gaggle of Yadudes Searching a grassy knoll with their cellphones for flashlights for something small enough to blend in with the earth, but not shiny enough to reflect LCD light. There was a couple standing in front of the bus having a fight. Apparently they were headed to a club in Chicopee.
We explored the mostly nonexistent downtown, went to the outlets and made dinner. We ate all home meals on the back porch I was mostly in my underwear, which is how I prefer to be anyways. We had some of a bottle of Shiraz and spent lots of time relaxing. It was a fun time. We enjoyed ourselves.
Work is great. I'm completely trained in one of the house and am being trained in the second. So far, I like 95% of the staff and all of the guys in the houses. I am getting a little frustrated with people outside the program. I want to hit every well intentioned idiot I run into. Yes, these people are retarded, but sometimes there are greater forces at work. Like the store sample lady who tried to give the man with diabetes and a swallowing disorder (he can't eat solid foods) cookies. And when we said no thank you, she handed them to him and said, "oh, no. He can have some." And it's like no...he can't. And if he weren't retarded, you'd have taken no for an answer. And it get much worse with these people, but not within the bounds of what I can actually discuss.
My birthday was last friday. I called in a PL day to work. Went to visit Michele and the new baby. Ella was so cute. Cinnamon and her kids were there. It was a nice time. Ella identifies Stewart in pictures (as Dewartt!) so cute. Stewart and I met up at the mall and ran into Celine. It was odd because I was thinking of calling her on the way back from the mall to see if she was available to hang out for the evening. Stewart went home to nap, etc. and Cece and I shopped. We all went to Sophia's And met Liz at the bar. Cari and Melissa Lemanske showed up. I got drunk. Jay came after work. Drew ended up being at the bar that night with his lady friend, who I almost punched in the face for getting up on Stewart. It bears mentioning that Drew's lady friend is one of the heinous exes (The one who cheated on him with a man of the same name and gets on his shit EVERY time we run into her.) Next time I'm going to berate her within an inch of slitting her wrists. It's been awhile since I had a good vent at someone.
We went out with Nate and Pojo on Tuesday night. Started at sophia's. Ended up at haven (goth night at Diva's). It was interesting. Pojo was meeting his ex girl friend. Nick and Amanda were there. Stewart and I entertained ourselves by participating in advanced people watching. Nate was pretty bored. But we did get to watch Pojo dance.... And I laughed. It was beach night and had I known, I'd have dressed for it. I got slightly intoxicated. The bartender was cute. We went to Denny's after.
Stewart's Car is dead. He intends to do car shopping tomorrow. I hope it works out for him.
I got my new laptop. I love it.